Seventeen stories down, the world looked minuscule enough to not matter. It didn't matter what these tiny people were thinking, it didn't matter how many deadlines or digits were there in their accounts. Everything zoomed down to nothing.
This was the last straw, he didn't know any better way of dying. Pills were difficult and unreliable, "waking up in hospital with failed suicide attempt would be embarrassing". He didn't know where to get a gun. Hanging seemed like risky, "definitely the fan won't be able to bear our weight". Lying on a train track seemed too cruel to oneself. Jumping seemed like the best idea.
"So, are you sure?" Asked the tiger.
"Yea! I feel like dying. Not good or bad. Not chosen or denied. It's just a feeling. I live with it and now I wanna be lived with it" Said the man.
They both looked at each other and a smile crossed their faces.
"kinda Batman feel no? " The tiger giggled.
"Hahaha! Right. Sitting here on edge sure feels like batman thing." The man smiled.
"So... You know when you can't think of a particular word but you know there's word that goes there. You don't know the word but you know that's missing. That's how I feel, all the time. Missing something very integral to me" the man continued.
The tiger nodded as if trying to comprehend what the man just said.
"Its a cruel joke that the universe gave us this consciousness" the man continued, "we know we will die but what is the purpose? Animals have it easy, they don't have to.."
"Oh really, you think we got it easy " the tiger chided. Not hiding his discomfort.
"I am sorry... I didn't mean it that way. We have been together for so long to know this. What I mean, the inherent understanding that amassing knowledge, friends and family is of no reason. Aren't we gonna just die, anyway? What's the point, we all gonna be gone in a century".
"Its about immediate survival of your species... About your kids and their kids... Their decision to choose their philosophy and meaning of their life." Said the tiger.
"And why should I even bring them in this world? For all they will have a brief period to look back at fleeting memories. And the sun will consume the earth and the solar system and eventually all the stars will be wink out into the oblivion. There will be nothing but emptiness in all directions for forever and infinity. With no hope of recovery and no one to remember the wretched short period of our existence in this vast universe. We are nothing but just a futile scream into the world before going quietly into the oblivion." The man resigned, struggling to breathe.
"I am reading this book which says, It's not emptiness. It's discontinuity that we suffer from. Do your regular stuff and you will feel accomplishment and fulfillment, which brings joy" the tiger said lightly, not trying to preach.
"Damnit! I can't be happy and now I have to be fulfilled. Fuck! I am jumping. You coming?"
"Ofcourse"
And they jumped.
"WoohooHobbesWeAreFlying. Look wind gushing through our hair, zero gravity" Noises were getting louder...Honk, chatter and...thaaaip! "Guhh! It hur..."
Done.
This was the last straw, he didn't know any better way of dying. Pills were difficult and unreliable, "waking up in hospital with failed suicide attempt would be embarrassing". He didn't know where to get a gun. Hanging seemed like risky, "definitely the fan won't be able to bear our weight". Lying on a train track seemed too cruel to oneself. Jumping seemed like the best idea.
"So, are you sure?" Asked the tiger.
"Yea! I feel like dying. Not good or bad. Not chosen or denied. It's just a feeling. I live with it and now I wanna be lived with it" Said the man.
They both looked at each other and a smile crossed their faces.
"kinda Batman feel no? " The tiger giggled.
"Hahaha! Right. Sitting here on edge sure feels like batman thing." The man smiled.
"So... You know when you can't think of a particular word but you know there's word that goes there. You don't know the word but you know that's missing. That's how I feel, all the time. Missing something very integral to me" the man continued.
The tiger nodded as if trying to comprehend what the man just said.
"Its a cruel joke that the universe gave us this consciousness" the man continued, "we know we will die but what is the purpose? Animals have it easy, they don't have to.."
"Oh really, you think we got it easy " the tiger chided. Not hiding his discomfort.
"I am sorry... I didn't mean it that way. We have been together for so long to know this. What I mean, the inherent understanding that amassing knowledge, friends and family is of no reason. Aren't we gonna just die, anyway? What's the point, we all gonna be gone in a century".
"Its about immediate survival of your species... About your kids and their kids... Their decision to choose their philosophy and meaning of their life." Said the tiger.
"And why should I even bring them in this world? For all they will have a brief period to look back at fleeting memories. And the sun will consume the earth and the solar system and eventually all the stars will be wink out into the oblivion. There will be nothing but emptiness in all directions for forever and infinity. With no hope of recovery and no one to remember the wretched short period of our existence in this vast universe. We are nothing but just a futile scream into the world before going quietly into the oblivion." The man resigned, struggling to breathe.
"I am reading this book which says, It's not emptiness. It's discontinuity that we suffer from. Do your regular stuff and you will feel accomplishment and fulfillment, which brings joy" the tiger said lightly, not trying to preach.
"Damnit! I can't be happy and now I have to be fulfilled. Fuck! I am jumping. You coming?"
"Ofcourse"
And they jumped.
"WoohooHobbesWeAreFlying. Look wind gushing through our hair, zero gravity" Noises were getting louder...Honk, chatter and...thaaaip! "Guhh! It hur..."
Done.
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